Whoever said being part of the vanguard was fun? No one I know, that’s for sure. In reality our society might lionize the one who leads the way, marches to the beat of his own drummer or whatever other cliché some to mind but in reality the nail that sticks up gets hammered down.
Genocide memorial. Rwanda 1999 © Damaso Reyes
So you’ve gone to school, taken a workshop with a master photographer, had lessons with me or just studied on your own… now what? What path will you choose? More important is why? In my observations many people present themselves with false choices in order to convince themselves to choose the road most traveled down. “There’s no money in photojournalism, I should shoot weddings,” is something someone told me not too long ago. What they forget is that dreams are never rational. They are the manifestation of our inner most desires.
Have you ever walked alone down a deserted road in the middle of the night far from home? Fear, uncertainty and panic are just some of the emotions that work their way through your mind as you listen for any out of place sounds, a shadow moving out of the corner of your eye. Having done just this in cities from Jakarta to Berlin to New Orleans I’ve come to terms with the long dark road.
Dancing in the dark. Stuttgart 2007 © Damaso Reyes.
I decided many years ago I didn’t want to pursue the path other had laid out for me. Perhaps I was too restless; maybe I just didn’t like the idea of creating another set of footprints on a well travelled road. I came to a fork in the road and took it, not knowing where it would lead.
I still don’t know where this road is going, but then again that’s the whole point.
There aren’t any explorers any more. You can’t really say I’m going to the ends of the Earth the way a 16th century prince might have. But you can become a visual explorer; you can travel down roads that have been forgotten and that go unpaved; you can challenge yourself to walk down that dark and lonely road far from home because that’s the best way to get to where you want to go, even if you have no idea where there is.
Hands. Switzerland 2007 © Damaso Reyes
But the road is dark. Fear will be your constant companion; uncertainty the jacket you wrap yourself in to protect against the night. I’ve come to live with these things, to accept, if not love, the feelings I get when I board a plane or train or boat destined for a foreign land armed only with the hope that if everything goes right I might have a chance. Of course often the best laid plans do often go astray. You find yourself off the map, not quite where dragons lie but close enough.
Then you look around, take stock of your surroundings and yourself and say: “this is why I became an explorer.”
